The only problem with subtitling your book “A Practical Guide to Winning the Culture War” is that people like to ask you if we really are going to win. 

“Peachy, things look pretty bleak right now. You said we’re going to win. Are we?”

It’s true, things do look mighty bleak at the moment. Nasty people who hate us are in charge of everything, from our elite universities to our comically bumbling military.

We’re also on track to welcome another ten million or so foreign invaders Our Greatest Strength, who are swarming the cities and rural hinterlands coast to coast. Most are barely literate, unmarried military-age men from the worst hellholes across the third world great nations generously sending us Our Greatest Strength.

Flown to South America or Mexico for free, mainly via Turkey and Dubai, by friendly WEF-aligned NGOs (Catholic charities anyone?), the undocumented masses march into American sovereign territory and are ushered into our greatest cities and metropolises with open arms, thanks to various “Immigrant Outreach” charities funded by virtue-signaling billionaires.

In 2023, beleaguered citizens who managed to survive the Covid era were forced to run an ever-worsening gauntlet of dangerous drugs, pharmaceuticals, vaporized savings, open hostility to white males, degenerate transgenderism as the new religion taught in schools, ubiquitous porn, and generalized despair.

Abroad, our imbecilic, greedy government is determined beyond reason to trigger multiple wars with ruthless foes we have no hope of defeating with conventional military tactics. Question: Houthi hell are the Houthis?

Our leaders know we hate all of this, but more war means more shiny plinka-plinka pouring into their Swiss bank accounts. War is also harmful for their key political enemy (young Christian males who die in foreign wars and tend to vote R), but it’s all upside to our leaders.

Some still wonder why the average American IQ, education level, fertility rate, life expectancy, suicide rate, overdose rate, and obesity rate continues to get worse. A mystery!

Meanwhile at home, deep inside our most powerful institutions, a different form of invader is busy at work, gnawing at the foundations and weakening the superstructure holding this whole thing we call a great nation together. These voracious termites are busy devouring the framing, walls, and towering achievements of the American government, and we can see it all teetering, wobbling before it shatters to the ground. 

The clearest examples of these pests are this year’s smug, childless girl bosses who are somehow in control of federal elections. These Hillary Clinton clones include smug Colorado Secretary of State Jena Griswold, her crazy-eyed Maine counterpart Shenna Bellows, and various other pantsuit-wearing apparatchiks and lickspittles who ruthlessly interfere in any election they choose. These Ballot Karens have sworn on their Saint George Floyd Bibles to uphold their sacred duty, which of course is to erase Donald Trump from existence—starting with his name on all printed matter statewide.

“Defending Democracy” is the hilarious Orwellian phrase they use to describe their life’s work of preventing democracy. 

Now let’s look at the fanatics who are inexplicably in control of our biggest cities and our judiciary. Here we have not the white Hillary replicants, but an endless army of trained Al Sharpton clones. 

There is the braggadocious Alvin Bragg, the Manhattan D.A. who arrested and perp walked American subway hero Daniel Penny. There is the comically inept Brandon Johnson, the mayor of Chicago who employed the clever Smollett defense to blame his city’s looting and carjacking on Trump voters. Chicago really is MAGA country, I guess.

Johnson, you recall, replaced the comically inept Mayor Lori Lightfoot. Eric Adams, the comically inept mayor of New York, replaced the comically inept Mayor Bill de Blasio (the last white guy who will ever be allowed to run a large civic organization). My hometown, Los Angeles, is dying a slow and painful death at the hands of Mayor Karen Bass. 

Then there are their allies, safely ensconced in cushy state and city A.G. and D.A. offices, busy doing the work of Satan: releasing dangerous felons to rampage through town stabbing anyone they like, while they relentlessly pursue the only man they want to clap in leg irons: Donald Trump.

Legal eagles like LA County D.A. George Gascón, Fulton County D.A. Fani Willis, D.C. Judge Tanya Chutkan, and New York A.G. Letitia James: do their wings ever get tired of soaring so high?

If we can’t defeat people like this, we probably deserve to lose. 

This Means All is Lost, Right?

Not so fast! Take that noose off your neck and step down from the ledge. Unload the Glock. Disconnect the exhaust pipe from the hose emptying into your car. Put those pills back in the medicine cabinet.

All is not lost, despite all evidence to the contrary.

“Winning” does not begin and end on Election Day Election Season. It is not a one-year or four-year process. Winning, in fact, has very little to do with elections, or laws, or all these terrible things besetting us from every direction. Political victory is far downstream of cultural victory. Andrew Breitbart understood this so clearly. 

There is some evidence pointing to a victory, even when it looks like we’re about to lose the country for good. 

There is still tremendous strength in our numbers. 

74,233,975 people voted for Trump in 2020, a good five million more votes than Obama got in 2008. This official number doesn’t include the ballots SEIU precinct flunkies accidentally lost. We are legion. We are everywhere. Stop acting like you’re alone in your foxhole and go make some friends.

The feminist tide is finally turning. 

Young women are learning the hard way that feminism is making it harder for them to get the things they actually want, like a nice husband and a few cute babies. Trad is becoming trendy and this will only increase as the economy worsens and career prospects dim in 2024. Single-income households will become the ideal and the aspiration for millions of unhappy females. Look for “stay-at-home girlfriends” to transition to stay-at-home moms. 

Fat people are finally shrinking.

While I do NOT recommend mass adoption of Ozempic for regular people with sub-30 pounds to lose, semaglutide will change the lives of many morbidly obese and addicted people in red states. We need these people on our side, and we don’t need them keeling over from heart attacks too soon. 

The worst media behemoths are bleeding out.

Disney, Netflix, and the mainstream media are in collapse. No one is watching, no one cares, and none of their blockbusters are hitting. There is still nothing on the Right that can compete with even a dying Hollywood ecosystem, but at least it’s fun to watch companies that hate us suffer and squirm, hoisted upon their own DEI petards.

Parents are fleeing public schools.

I don’t care about taking over school boards and education reform. It’s a waste of time. Your kids can’t spend another day in these toxic child processing plants. Get them out, now. Homeschooling, classical schools, pods, and other options exist and people are flocking to them—especially in the worst blue hellholes. “California experienced the 6th consecutive decrease in total Public K-12 Enrollment in the 2022-23 school year (-40,000 students). Over the next ten years, if current trends in fertility and migration hold, a further decline of 661,500 in total enrollment is projected, resulting in total enrollment of 5,191,000 by 2032-33.”

People aren’t having enough babies, but it’s mostly liberals choosing to commit genetic suicide.

Trads, Christians, Catholics, and other baby-friendly types on the Right are still leaning into parenthood and big families. The libs are staying childfree and for good measure, shooting their kids up with “puberty blockers,” which, in a hilarious plot twist, are actually grandchild blockers. They’re wiping out their own genetic lines on purpose! And as I like to say, never interrupt they/them when they’re making a mistake. 

Military enlistment numbers are plummeting.

That’s the sound of young men getting wise to the DOD’s bullshit. Once they hit a critical low and the Biden Cartel ensnares itself in three foreign wars, they’ll have to bring back the draft. Fortunately for us, the new draft will have draconian DEI recruitment rules. Look for extremist, racist white males with Trump bumper stickers to be at the bottom of the list! Drag queens, furries, and transwomen: this is your time to shine. As you’re being airdropped into Yemen, we will be praying for you from our safe and secure locations at home.

The 2024 Paris Olympics will be an Overton Window event for biological women.

The Olympic Boxing Federation just ruled that biological men can beat biological women to a bloody pulp in matches. Many other biological men will be beating biological women in other events, including track and field. This will only accelerate the backlash against the madness and, maybe one day, sooner than you think, end it once and for all. But we can at least enjoy watching woke female athletes get their Olympic dreams shattered and lose to faster, stronger men!

The Overton Window is moving in our direction. 

Things that were until recently unthinkable and unsayable are now being said, in public and on TV. “White genocide is real.” “Great replacement is not a conspiracy theory.” “Covid came from the lab.” “There are two genders.” “Claudine Gay is a fraud who got her job because of race quotas.” Imagine how far we can push the window next year!

Cringe right-wing content will finally improve. Maybe.

2024 will be the year “right-wing entertainment” finally finds its legs and stops churning out cringeworthy, unfunny, non-entertaining entertainment. Sorry, I don’t have high hopes for The Daily Wire’s remake of Snow White. (Are there really Ben Shapiro listeners yearning to see his female body double dance with dwarves?) Things people actually want to see will start to emerge from unlikely sources. From outsiders. From non-political entities. Wait and see—it’s coming!

TL;DR: do not lose hope! They want us hopeless, so we all give up, stop fighting, and pour ourselves another drink. Luckily, I finally got too old last year to drink too much, so I’ll be nursing my one can allotment of Ultra Right beer as I relax in my bubble bath, fully dressed, thinking about all the good things we have left. 

Not in L.A., of course, but I hear there are still some nice things out in other states.

Happy 2024, good luck, and I’ll see you at the finish line—survive!