Salvo 09.22.2021 10 minutes

I’m Not a Domestic Extremist, I’m Just Extremely Domestic

super housewife

"In this house, sometimes it feels good to be hated."

Homegrown Tradism

The Great Reset began in earnest this month with the Great Reveal, as the emboldened elites unfurled their blueprints for our coming re-education centers.

George W. Bush got so excited about his new position as Assistant (to the) Gulag Commissar that he mixed up his job acceptance speech with his 9/11 memorial speech.

I should tell him about the time my dad got his car keyed because he had a “W” sticker on the bumper.

“Domestic extremists” are the main threat to the homeland, they tell us. “White supremacists” are the real terrorists.

Meanwhile the non-extreme experts in charge of the planet just obliterated seven toddlers at their home in Kabul, but that was fine, since state-sanctioned child murder is, well, state-sanctioned.

The Regime’s definition of “domestic extremist” is expanding rapidly. Their list of threats now includes anyone who chooses to wait on a Covid vaccine or doesn’t want their healthy teenage son to risk myocarditis.

It includes dangers to the homeland like asthmatic toddlers on airplanes and anyone who doesn’t wish to construct a 10-unit apartment building in their backyard to house needy Afghans and their pregnant 11-year-old brides.

(Don’t worry, these guys spit cook their goats so they won’t touch your Traeger, you bigot.)

As I typed this the Regime was ringing the Capitol with fencing and stocky stormtroopers—again—to prevent “attacks” from “violent right-wing extremists.” The only people who showed up were reporters, Antifa losers, and CIA spies laughably costumed as white supremacists.

You thought a “homegrown terror” was the preschooler who smashed your new TV when he tried to get his Buzz Lightyear toy to fly?

You thought a “sleeper cell” was the darkened bedroom your teenager creates to doze through her alarm?

Time for her to wake up.

They could drone strike a thousand orphanages in Asia and a million preschools in Afghanistan and the calculus would not change: you, friend, are the bad guy.

Extremists and tigers and bears, oh my!

The Pentagon’s right about one thing: there are domestic extremists everywhere! You probably saw some today and didn’t even know it.

Know the signs. Be ready to call the authorities. We’re all in this together—it’s up to us to protect Our Democracy.

I spotted two such groups of domestic extremists just a few weeks ago. As a trained expert, I knew what to look for.

No, not the purple-haired receipt eater in the Antifa t-shirt who teaches your kindergartener about genital exploration at your local public school.

No, not the peaceful BLM protesters who poured gasoline on NYPD cops as they sat in their van. Their own quirky 9/11 tribute, I suppose.

Why, all that stuff is as American as gluten-free apple pie!

I’m talking about real domestic extremists, walking around like regular people. Beware! Use extreme caution when approaching.

These terrorists had the nerve to walk into a mass on Sunday. The ringleader of one terror cell was a cishet white female who wore a newborn in a carrier on her chest and cradled a toddler on her hip. She had at least two or three other small extremists with her.

In the other group, the terror mastermind was at least nine months pregnant with a future terrorist, and she controlled four other youth trainees who sat quietly beside her. These women have clearly drilled their minions to be obedient and obey any commands. Very scary.  

Also, none wore masks! One wore a lace veil over her head, as if that would do anything to stop the Delta variant.

I reported them to the local police department. They’ve got three detectives on the case now—they’re working in shifts to hunt them down.

When I got home, I spotted a neighbor’s house with a giant RECALL GAVIN NEWSOM sign, right on the front lawn! These terrorists have grown emboldened, posting violent rhetoric like this next to their rhododendrons. During Pride month, I noted that the same house chose not to hang a rainbow flag on their house. Truly frightening.

I’m not the only one who’s noticing the uptick in dangerous extremism in America. Obama lickspittle Arne Duncan recently tweeted: “Have you noticed how strikingly similar both the mindsets and actions are between the suicide bombers at Kabul’s airport, and the anti-mask and anti-vax people here? They both blow themselves up, inflict harm on those around them, and are convinced they are fighting for freedom.”

I might not have flown a plane into a skyscraper recently, but I am against vaccine mandates. Not against vaccines, mind you—just mindless, punitive mandates.

I never wore a suicide vest and blew up a restaurant, but I do think little kids wearing masks all day long is imbecilic.

I never slaughtered dozens of innocents at a nightclub, but I am glad Texas is putting an end to the slaughter of thousands of innocents in the womb.

I support defunding Planned Parenthood and I hope my children have as many babies as they can get away with. I pray that my daughters and my future daughters-in-law choose to stay home to raise my grandchildren.

I think young mothers need to be deprogrammed from thinking it’s good or normal to hand their infants to unrelated strangers earning slave wages so that they can “work” for slightly more than slave wages.

I want every daycare in America to shut its doors for good. I yearn to liberate all those tiny diapered inmates from captivity and their surly, minimum wage prison guards, and reunite them with their newly deprogrammed mothers.

If the imbecilic destructors running American foreign policy blunder their way into far off trouble that requires a military draft, I will pack up my fighting-age kids and sail far away.

Lean in to radical normalness

Since there is no escape from their lies about you, you have two choices: affix the necessary rainbow-colored flags and BLM signs to your home and join the regime, at least on paper—or embrace your inner extremist.

I vote for the latter. The more of us that do so, the better. As I have said many times here, there is great strength in our numbers! Join the swelling ranks of enemies to the Regime! You already are one so you might as well accept it and move on.

Remember that you only look radical in comparison to the dangerous villains and perverted freaks who have claimed the mantle of “mainstream” and control 100% of American institutions. You must embrace your radical normalness—before it’s too late.

In a world where it’s “normal” for doctors to inject 6 year olds with off-label puberty blockers and for elected officials to condone and enable mass ballot fraud, you must remain “abnormal.”

Force our wicked, godless Regime to redraw the blueprints for our future gulags. They will need larger barracks, more tents, more Centers for Mostly Peaceful Instruction. You scare them. Did you know that? Maybe you didn’t, since you are tired from nursing and diapers and making dinner, raising your family and working your jobs and paying your bills and filling your car with overpriced foreign fuel. It is exhausting.

But you terrify them. They see you coming down the street, or walking down the narrow airplane aisle with your arms full of babies, and they shudder in horror.

Our superpower is this: these godless demons don’t scare us.

They hate us, but we pity them and pray for their conversion.

They wish we were dead, but we wish they would just up and leave us alone.

Hold your head high! Flaunt your maskless children with joy!  Let their scorn and derision flow through you!

“If the world hates you, know that it hated Me first.” (John 15:18)

Now go forth—and be radical.

The American Mind presents a range of perspectives. Views are writers’ own and do not necessarily represent those of The Claremont Institute.

The American Mind is a publication of the Claremont Institute, a non-profit 501(c)(3) organization, dedicated to restoring the principles of the American Founding to their rightful, preeminent authority in our national life. Interested in supporting our work? Gifts to the Claremont Institute are tax-deductible.

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